It’s hellavah week. I encounter a totally different phase of
life in one same timeline. Life and death; starting and ending; birth & dying, well in
this case: welcome and goodbye.
I met someone from a lucid memory in my childhood. She’s a friend from my old neighborhood, 1st grade actually. we play, we fooling around
and suddenly she just left to Merauke for an unknown reason. And last week on a normal
working time, a busy afternoon where i’m about to die in my work files my phone rang. i know
it’s ringing but i didn’t pick it up coz its got no contact name. twice, and three time its
still ringing, i know i was captivating my computer to my hand but something told me i
should pick this one up.
"Hello" was a normal ambience coming from my
starting conversation on the phone. she start introducing herself, her name was Indi. and i wasn’t
aware who she was until she mentioned our old living place and everything stopped. after
13 years my clock began to turning back itself, a flashing points of my childhood
memories. a child where i see so happy and free, so beautiful it was until i kept it as a
dream. seeing myself today and all my stupid life problems, i remember her in our past memories
as children.
we met that night and had a beautiful dinner. she was so
happy, i was so happy. we talk like there was no more forever. she’s been looking for me from 6
years ago and how she struggle until she found my cell phone number. i appreciate
of what her did, for someone who is no one in this big old space of universe. we held
hand as we go out from Colors, a bar where i used to enjoy my moment of Jazz after work. a
nice pasta menu and some cool jazz band accompany us that night. she actually kissed me
when she asked am i in a relationship. i didn’t answer as i don’t want to hurt her
golden feelings of what she expected from me.
she kept calling me after our meeting, day after day, hours
after hours. i tried best not to pick up her calls or replying her message. i don’t want to
give her so much hope and let her
hand go from a cliff of desperation. after so many years,
i’m a change man, and i know the same changes throughout her life too. please don’t make me
hurt you gurl, let the past becomes a secret of your future. i cannot pretend i love
you, it’s just as throwing dust in your eyes and dance all the way.
well, a week later my aunt died. she’s not my aunt really
but someone who raised me from a baby and really close to our family, practically she is my
aunt. she died of asthma. i know that sad news from my mom the next morning. her nephew called me the night before but i was so busy doing my work i didn’t pick up her call. damn
it!! if i knew how important that call i would pick that call rite away. she spent 3 days in
hospital and i wasn’t there.
that morning i didn’t go to work. i go straight to her
funeral even though it’s quite far from where i’m living. i don’t care, at least i’m there
before the earth swallow her inside. i notice all around me. i’m not so close with the family and
i saw so many old faces. i still remember how we was back in those years. as if my mind just
stop recognizing people from the moment i left them. and now so many lines drawn in their
faces, so many sad and downcast eyes all around me. how many years has passed in my
life.
how people would jump right infront of me after so many years. and how someone who really loves me and care for me just left without any goodbye. what we hold now dear is just something belongs to the past from the start. eventually we would leave them in the starting line and taking a glance of ourselves on the finish lines.
think about the future, its still traveling
too much confidence on what you have
they aint are dear to feel this safe
overload your destiny & you’ll wake up behind it
la lang
yahhhhhh its vry nice to leave the past but u can acknowledge it at the present
,maybe the gurl returns,, because shewants u ,apparently…u must even think that anythin happens 4 a reason,,,,
maybe she left ….w/o goodbyes because …she didnt know that ull b affected during the tym she left,or she dont want 2 mke u sad.bt i know its unfair….. she nver said goodbye cause she wants 2 return…in spite of all lifes changes
not all people ,seem to return for u,but u can confront her anyway she’ll understand it.maybe she was destined to comeback for a reason hhhhahahhaha
i’m just a passerby who happen to read your blog and i can instantly felt how you felt as written in the blog. life is always a suprise and suprise always creeping behind you without any warning, be it a happpy one or a sad one. my grandma passed away only 2 weeks before i go back my hometown to see her…imagine the shock i got and it’s so hard to believe and seeing her lying in the coffin made me so …lost in mind. But i know one thing, she’d gone back to THE ABOVE and i always have that peace, knowing she’ll watch over me. so just take it easy for whatever things happen and as for your gal fren, treat her as a friend and dont try to avoid her coz it would be so sad case ….juz be frank with her about your feeling…it’s even better to let her have a short pain, knowing that you’re not interested than a long pain not knowing why you been avoiding her.
well, you dont have to take my point seriously as this is only my two cents worth for you.take care and peace.
are you an alpha phi omega??
=really it suckz..13 years what kind of memories u had share to each other that u eventually think that is the most unfergetable one…its such a shame for a gal to put her self back to u..but u know what ur life is a waste if u sobb ur self in ur stupid desk and think about all the good things u acquire ryt now..know what ur living in a uncolorful world but someone tried to do so did u think that ur girl ryt now is the best one…i think not…so why dont u open ur heart for her..u just dont know the true intension she wants to give to you…..whahhaha am i a bias type get my point..but dont believe im just freaking out..peace keep the concept of mine….
?
elow…
it is part of the challenges that our Lord had made for us. i think u should do more good for ur self & start a new life wiyh Christ.
helow!
Don’t give up that is only trials that god given to us. Just countinue praising him coz thier is no imposible.
..mAYbE it’S lOvE Or mAybE nOt..
LOVE hAs it’s Own reAsOn fOr it’S cOminG aNd gOinG..
nice colors.
peace out! ! !
i got bored reading this one. .
cool
…no reaction
..no reaction
just deal or no deal…
think about iy.
TO ALL!I WANT TO HAVE A MORE FRIEND!
may i know first pleasee…!!!
brain wash kana nga siguro
nice.. xah. hehehe.. Blehhh…
hmm…yeah. take care dude.
thanx a lot to you all
HereS WishinG YoU a GooD LifE, SmilE FoR AlL ThE GoodtimeS, Be GlaD FoR AlL That’S DonE..LooK WitH UnderstandinG, FinD OuT WhaT YoU AlreadY KnoW..AfteR a ThorougH Self-examinatioN DeterminE WhaT YoU ReallY WanT AnD WorK FoR it AgainsT AlL OddS.
pa add po
ur so nice dudes
hi mr.brainwashed. don’t you worry what other people say.
this world is crazy and we only can survive by being more crazier than them.
you’re kinda cute too
kz naman ikaw eh……..k lng yan pray u nlang k….godblesss u
nice
naaah…i just think ur cool!
k lang yan…. dot give up….
have a happy dae and get married soon!
as i read your blog, at first i kinda know what you’ve gone through but then i got confused a bit, because i thought that seeing the gurl from the “past” made you so happy, i’m just wondering why did you have to avoid her all of a sudden, i think maybe because the feeling of knowing that she was looking for you after all the years that passed makes you feel kinda wanted huh… i think it sucked for the gurl who went through all that just to find out that your kinda happy to see her at first but then you’re avoiding her for some blurry reasons… oh man, you have to straight some things up in your life from time to time, don’t leave things behind thinking that you can still get back at it whenever you want to, because life is not like that, just like what happened to your aunt… i know for sure you reget of not being with her during the last few moments in her life, but if you’ll not repeat the same mistakes that you did, i’m sure she’ll be happy, because atleast you learned something from what have happened…
think about the future, its still traveling
too much confidence on what you have
they aint are dear to feel this safe
overload your destiny & you’ll wake up behind it
think other things than to doing nonesense
Time is a companion that goes with us on a journey. It reminds us to cherish each moment, because it will never come again. What we leave behind is not as important as how we have lived. It’s no good trying to keep up old friendships. It’s painful for both sides. The fact is, one grows out of people, and the only thing is to face it. Good day!
*Tatch*
lovesick? happens all the time…
wen i read ur blog i kinda shock but i lyk it
hoy bokal
pangit ng buhok mo
bokal
wehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehhehehehehehehehehehehehweheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheh awana oy tanga
nice dude coolll
nicE coLloR. . .
hehE!!!!
alpHa pHi OmEga kA pUBa?
pA aDd nmn pUh Aq0h sA fRiEndStEr Moh. . .
bakit ganun ka sa kanya????????
well written….as if by a professional writer! so vivid and so colorful….
prayers will do help u!! nice blog! i really felt what u have gone through!!!
i salute
nice blog..
eow….
I like it. Can u be my friend?
dont think to much about the past,step forward for the future.give important also to other people behind you.remember this one only god will keep you safe and give you peace in life.your trials become your stepping stone in life.step forward,good luck and god bless.
dude!!!!!!!
DONT GO FOR A GURL U LOVE
BUT GO FOR A GURL THAT LOVE U….
FRIENDS ARE LIKE BALLOONS
ONCE YOU LET THEM GO
YOU CAN NEVER BRING THEM BACK
-take care dude-
for me past is past….let yourself be in the future, stay away to your past….frnd
AZZTIIGGG!!!!
>mahal na kta!!!
gezz! ur a heartbreaker men!
well u kinda just dontlove her really but…you like her as a friend.Good,at least your true to urself.Yaaah for the gurl,its TO-turn off to do that…calling several times.mistake,mistake..pa hard to get ke neman,d ba guyzz!!!!!!
he???bakit omega……….?pakita k naman nooooooo.
i like it
u must talk to her again man, GOD sent her to u on purpose, she didn’t meet u for nothing man. u just can’t erase ur past…. i mean if u leave something behind???
i was frozen on my plastic seat, the door letting me peek outside where three pairs of my shoes there lie. Darkness drowned me to the thought I rarely wander within. The past. Present. The future. Oftentimes, I would suspect that everything there is in the future, are just continuation of cases started from the very past, the people, the events, the chances fused with it. No new ones to be significantly effecting. No new faces to be significantly affecting. Just the ones before, long way back within the first quarter of life. Thereafter lies the present. Where you can choose, rest your feet, unload your pack, and watch the world like an spectator in a stage play or leave and start that something which end is just the continuation of what you always wanted to avoid, forget, or let past. Neither, saves you from the illusion of life’s mystery of incomprehendability. But the former, gives you the time, so much of it, to feel and let memories penetrate your being. And the latter, gives you more chances to live, and fulfill the mission of an explorer to just experience the world. Then, there’s the future, its never promised. With all possibilities, and most being however probable, is still a chance which favorability equals its corresponding unfavorability. Life’s a continuing struggle to continue life itself. The events from the past, the choice from the present, are composite to who you are and what you will be in the future, if you succeed knowing the mystery, then you will know that whatever happens, there’s nothing to be surprised of because you were trained and prepared from the past, to make the decisions of today, and that when tomorrow never comes, its given, no surprises, no one promised it, no reason to feel dark, cause you know from the very start, everything is possible, the possibilities are infinite, and the choices are only made by no one but you. Live today. Learn from today’s yesterday, and tomorrow live like its yesterday.
grabe hba ng story m nxtime q nlng bsahin gudlak kaya m yan….fr.babyangel
ganda………….
just spend a litle more tym 2 thnk bout it.. mlamang hangang s ngaun ngkkmali k p..tandaan m., ngkmali k man khapon… at mgkmali k man uli ngaun.. u dont hav 2 be too bothered… knw y.? kc ull stil comit a mistake 2morow.. dont wory.. its just natural… honestly speakng.. wer drowning in d same wild river..it just hapen n hnggang ngaun ms gus2 q n magicp muna ng maicp.. hindi muna dpt ngre2act s mga ngya2ri… thnk ok. thnk… then thnk again…
nice
tae
hey! ive read your story, 8’s quite fascinating.. maybe she came back for a purpose. that’s lyf!
i think ur inluv wid her… bakit di mo na lng cia kya niligawan.. ano b ung dailan bat d mo cia kayang mahalin…? think it well again…… coz u do have a chance and time to court ur first childhood luv..!!!
hey…nvyt me on ur frndster http://www.zyl_rocker025@yahoo.com
nyz shot!!!!!!!
n touch mhe….
grabe….
quite nys but lacks emotional impact on myself.
aztig!!!
:0
hello po wala lang trip lang kasi dami samin yan eh ok lang ba hehehehe sorry sa pag umipal ko ha
comment ko pag patuloy nyolang yan maganda yan hehehe
hehehe lam mo minsan ang tao nag kakamali my kasabihan ngang no people perfect diba sana add mo ko pero d me maganda ha
hehehehe
Nyeeeeeekkkzzzzzzzzz….
kuya lam mo ganda ng buhok mo hehehe kinis kasi eh hehehe jokes pogi ka kaya?
Nyeeeeeekkkzzzzzzzzz….
hi?how r u?i hope u r ok everyday i think do u like to see a many friends in phil.i ask u im here 4 u add me if u like me im lyka makhooletz nice to see u coz ur sweet and cute me too i have a face cute hehehehehehe
add me Jhene_Orbita@yahoo.com i have a face cute hehehehhehehe:)
wEll……..
thats bAd…..
bUt who knows……
life is full af little surprises……
hi,ok lng yan dat’s lyf prang buhay.kya mo yan!kung ako nga ba2e nkya ko kaw pa kya!auz gnda ng blog mo.ghe ingat’z.
hello! tat was cool, 6 years
im just a passer-by hehe
haiiii
tis life..or something like it.. careful..
Hi, sorry gd iha wala ko pa matapos basa, kay ga lilibat nako… anyway, if you believe all things are possible… try to call on our show. have a nice day tnx.
how will o know if you’re in trouble???
No more comment. Everything have been said. Take care u nalang for the next journey of your life.
Shit happens.. atleast life sucks for free! weh>?
ellow……just wanna be ur friend.
WHEN i read your story it was pleasure coz you met old friend or maybe your oldgirlfriend but now you did’nt love her anymore right?the point i just enjoy your story he..he..he..coment?well..think first about what you will do…be patient and SEMANGAT….
all have reason,all have answer,so just think that all happen is so easy!if you wan’t try me!
wahehe..everything has a solution
…hOnEstLy I dDn’t UndErstAnd iT..haHaHaAH..bUt thEN jUst sAyinG dOn’t gIve Up mY fRiend wiSh u oL d bEst rEmemBer gOd iS wiTh uS…eVery pRoblem Has a sOLutiOn..
hmm…the memory beyond is what you seak…..
Add me up..
Raphael_czarow@yahoo.com okie
hello wazzzzz up dudz……..!!!!!!!!! take care alwayz……….!!!!!!!!!
add nyo ko lady_gomennasai@yahoo.com
1st of , sorry bout wad happen to ur “aunt”
2nd, I think u should just confront the gurl, dun drag it on cause it’ll only hurt more
-jus a Kid
Go …. Got and Geted
The Opportunity no’t comes twice to you.
If you already make few mistake in past time. I have a wise word for you :
Don’t make same mistake twice
Or
To Life is To Die.
2nd word is right to you. Do I wrong? Prove it to me
Best Regards
Hendra
It’s better to love and lost than never to love at all…
perhap you’re just afraid
but hey! who doesn’t?
hey there. i really enjoyed reading your blog :] …take care always…i will probably keep reading..hehehe…
“”"LIFE GOES ON BRO”"”
enjoyed reading d blog………………………….
way atik………..hhheeheheheh
astig….nude body….gwapo b????joke….
i a have great advice to you not only you for all my great advice is be my freiandster this is my email add zaro_77@yahoo.com
i hope you not miss it thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu very much zaro_77@yahoo.com
Jesus Christ man. You cant just avoid people like that, especially if she was searching for you for 6 years. Push people away too much, and no ones going to care about you one day. Trust me, I know from experience.
..”lahat ng bagay dito sa mundong ibabaw ay NAGBABAGO, isa lang ang hidi NAGBABAGO at yun ang PAGBABAGO!..”
u see things do change like that..unexpectedly…
well u gotta hold on and be strong..
only the strong survives,
and better prepare for more coming things that would shut ur mind up and beat u down…
so hold on…
everyone goes the same way..
we end up lying and be decayed…our soul may rest in peace,but while ur still alive,u got to struggle…im just 15,and i know whats life…whats the fads,and whst makes us act like this and that…
so hold on..courage u got to have man…
this is just my own way of thinking..please dnt make this as an advice..just a sense…
hewo, what I think about your blog is that ang kinabuhi lingin, nagtuyoktuyok ra na siya nga everyday may change naay mamatay ug mabuhi. mao ra na siya.
oh shit, i like ur blog
life is meaningless without knowing your purpose of living know your goal, 1 thing your english i like,
[2 Timothy 1:9] 9 who has saved us and called us to a holy life—not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace. This grace was given us in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time
that’z a vey sad story.. i can relate on you…u’ve ried a lot not to hurt the ghirl and i admire you of doing that thing…you’re such a kind man…
things like this reallyhappen in our lives but we must have the courage to face it all….’coz God knows we can bear it…
y he was BRAINWASH
Time is a sublime realm, there is no such thing as past present and future all these exist inter_relationally meaning they are all parts of the same whole, progressions of the same idea, cycles of the same energy past, present and future exist at one and the same “Time”
Everything progresses from one to another in a never ending circle.If u ask me i wouldnt just skip my past thinking that its only the past, everything in front of you right now is there because it has something for you to unravel and most of all its presented to u right now because this is what you need to uncover something deep within you that you’ve been longing to experience…go with it amicably there is a “PRE-SENT” there for you..
Again you made me confused but still i’d like to read your story.Is it about the girl or what i understand that people from the past resurfacing to your life once again just like a dream. You made the story at a random thoughts. What would i say is live life stay happy and write more gudluck
Again you made me confused but still i’d like to read your story.Is it about the girl or what i understand that people from the past resurfacing to your life once again just like a dream. You made the story at a random thoughts. What would i say is live life stay happy and write more gudluck
lalan !!!! haler
It’s nice to reminisced/rekindled the past, but as the trite phrases say “Don’t grieve over the past, learn to live one at a time…” it only means that you need to move on and keep on moving; i know ur feelings and i like ur blog !
my answer: simply break the enigma as the great persona of the enigma code alan turing a well known mathematecian, biologist at the height of world war II he broke the enigma code that leads to the invention of computer and does not conform the norm of the society as homosexual he was convicted of gross indecency by the establishment who later call him a hero ( sounds ironic)…which i believe that a genius is a boarder to insanity that leads him of committing suicide. stay cool and always keep on the right track!
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Thats very sad… >.<
Have time to your self…
not just work and work and work…
ala lang
nyc………..,
so touching…
that’s the spirit never let any0ne expect something from you if its not possible…
God bless you……….
u hav 2 b honest wen it comes to ur felings,ok
oii!im am skinhead
halleerr!!! magpakita ka nman dude!!
love 1 person, take care of them until you die, have
a good life.. be a good friend..try to be completely
who you are.and figure out what you personally
love..and like go after it with everything you’ve got
no matter how much it takes
hi i was captivated by your sad story…. try to live with its dilemma and always find the beauty out from it… ” when its darkest there is stars…” i know how you feel… and the ghost from the past will haunt you always cause it remains unfold… living here on earth is very hard… im searching for my purpose and the essence of my existence.. with all my experiences, pain , joy, sadness rolled into one.. its really hard for me to cope with this so called life.. i hope you build your own philosophy… detachment!
add my account che_espineli@yahoo.com thanks!
seee? alot of persons had just anticipated .about ur blog………and thy’re even acquainted on hw u feel on wt kind of .situation is into ur ……love echuz…journey.anyways…she come back it rarely means she wants u…….. kc ako babalik din ako s lalaki n iniwan k n alang paalm …..anyaway were just mg MU… closer to mg on…sana but i left…….w/o goodbyes.but then i was into karma…..iyak ng iyak……… my iba nga …indi m nmn mahal
this is nice
hahaha
grabe parang gusto ko maiyak…huhuhu…but really magaling ka magsulat ha…u know how to express ur emotions in writing….nice keep it up malay mo next tym pangtelenovela na…hahahaha
its rizza nways, nice nice nice……….i can relate in zat.
…nice blog, just kept on living make ur self a worthy one to others.. nakakarelate ako kunti sa story mo. girl ako, hwg kang mag pretend sa nararamdman mo sa kanya kung ano mam un…God Bless!..just have faith…
movo on….dats wat u have to do…just forget bout her
movo on….dats wat u have to do…just forget bout her
time to move on!!!!!!
unpredictable life huh?
If Life is a Game, I wish U always Win.If Life is a Journey, I wish U walk on Roses.If Life is Joy, I wish U always Smile…………@}-’—,—– May GOD Bless You in everything that you do.tc
i love this blog!
wala lang!
hello dear! what you’ve been through also happened to me..the irony is you still lucky.. my grandma the best grandma i ever had passed away a few days after i flied back to where i study recently…i even dont have a chance to say goodbye or kiss her or look at her face…i wish i could be there with my family and others…i still remember until now the way she hold my hand that festive nite…her voice…the way she look at me with that tender smile…eventhough she could hardly see…i dont mind when she cant remember my name as long as i could sit next to her…now when i step my feet into the house i could feel something missing…my grandma damn…miss her so much…
give her a chance bro…
give her a chance bro…
give her a chance bro…